I’ve been slacking lately with Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshops… but this week’s prompt has been something I’ve been thinking about lately so it was perfect timing!
My chosen prompt: A list of things you no longer have in common with your married/child bearing friends… and why you love them anyway.
Of the friends I am still in close contact with from high school and tend to see more than others… I am the only single one.
Not just “single” like everyone else has a boyfriend/girlfriend… but that they are all either married or will be very soon, and two of the couples have kids.
(My friends from Western are slowly catching up… a few here and there are married or engaged, but no kids yet except the ones that were married when I met them.)
95% of the time I am just fine with that. But this post isn’t about that 95% of the time, or even the other 5% of the time…
Things I No Longer Have in Common with My Married/Child-Bearing Friends…
1. Someone depends on them. Whether they are married, or married with a kid or two, someone expects them to be home at a certain time, that they perform their part of the household responsibilities, that they contribute to the betterment of the life that they have together.
I can relate… I have Taylor and Louie the Terror Kitty. I know they’re not really children, but they are as close as I am going to get for awhile. They pick on each other, depend on me for food (which is often more prepared than what I make for myself) and entertainment, and if I’m going to be away for awhile I have to arrange “critter-sitting” with my parents. Louie also has a tendency to get really crazy before bed time, like kids tend to do when they don’t want to fall asleep. Unfortunately I haven’t been able to get either one of them to fold laundry or vacuum… but Taylor does like to “help” clean out Louie’s litter box on occasion.
2. They have partners and forever-roommates. They have to agree on things, make decisions together, be aware and supportive of someone else’s wants and needs.
I do what I want, figure things out on my own (mostly), leave projects unfinished in the living room when they frustrate me.
3. They have dinner on a regular basis. Any probably even breakfast and lunch… which means they grocery shop, too!
I don’t. I forget, am too lazy, don’t have time, get distracted doing something else (or by something shiny), etc.
4. They don’t get asked about their love lives. Or maybe they do, and I’m just not there when someone asks them how their marriage is going.
Whereas I am asked ALL THE TIME. Really I don’t mind much… it’s usually by people who care and want to see me happy. I just feel like I am going to have to come up with something more interesting to explain my lack of love life than “can’t meet anyone at work, I don’t do bar scenes, all my friends are married with no other single friends…”
I love them all anyway…
My friends have great taste and have married wonderful people… which means I get to hang out with and get to know people I wouldn’t have known otherwise.
They are raising amazing children that I love being around.
We still have the important things in common (sometimes even more now than before they were married or had kids)… and I know that when it is my turn to get married and have kids I’ll have LOTS of people to turn to when I have questions, issues, etc.